What I'm Consuming

It’s been a while since I’ve shared a roundup of the content I’m currently consuming, so here you go!

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I’m infuriated and horrified by the American Academy of Pediatrics’ new guidelines for higher-weight children that include prescribing “intensive health behavior and lifestyle treatment” for kids as young as two, weight-loss drugs for kids ages 12 and up, and bariatric surgery starting at age 13. Yes, you read that right!

Not only do these guidelines further stigmatize larger-bodied kids and put them at risk for life-threatening complications, they are also potentially setting them up for a lifetime of weight cycling, disordered eating and exercise, eating disorders, body dissatisfaction and more adverse outcomes.

Journalist Virginia Sole-Smith shares her thoughts on this here:

Why the New Obesity Guidelines for Kids Terrify Me [New York Times, gift link]

And, in her Weight and Healthcare newsletter, researcher Ragen Chastain digs deep into the guidelines to reveal undisclosed conflicts of interest, unsupportive claims, inadequate research and more:

Dangerous New American Academy of Pediatrics Guidelines for Higher-Weight Children [Substack]

Serious Issues with the American Academy of Pediatrics Guidelines for Higher-Weight Children and Adolescents [Substack]

Testing the Claim That Pediatric Weight Management Interventions Decrease Eating Disorders [Substack] 

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Every Single Diet (Even When You Don’t Use That Word) is About These 15 Awful Things [Medium]
Writer Savala Nolan nails it in this article regarding many of the ways dieting is so very problematic, including some you may not even be aware of.

“My Weight Watchers memberships didn’t come with a pamphlet explaining that there is no data showing that weight suppression works beyond a brief time except on the rarest of occasions, or that food restriction often leads to binging, or that dieting might cause all types of physical and emotional harm, or that fatness was fine and I was terrific as-is, or that the whole shebang was rooted in anti-Blackness and, hey, being Black myself I might want to think twice about that. Like the dark side of all industries, the dark side of dieting isn’t advertised.”

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It’s a Big Fat Deal: How Schools Teach Contempt for Fat People—and What We Can Do About It [Rethinking Schools]
This article by teacher and writer Katy Alexander is essential reading for anyone who works with kids, has fat kids, was a fat kid, or just plain loves kids. Don’t miss their “For My Fatties” poem at the end.

“Fat kids don’t need you to save them from being fat. They need you to save them from your own feelings about fat and our fatphobic culture.”

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You Just Need to Lose Weight: And 19 Other Myths About Fat People 
Aubrey Gordon’s second book is just as powerful as her first one and both should be required reading for everyone. And if you aren’t listening to her Maintenance Phase podcast yet, I highly recommend you start today.

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Big Girl: A Novel
I’m wrapping up with this tender, hilarious and heartbreaking novel by Mecca Jamilah Sullivan about a fat Black girl coming of age in gentrifying 1990s Harlem who dares to take up space in a world that relentlessly tries to shrink her.

Note: In alliance with the fat-acceptance community, I use fat as a neutral descriptor.

My Resolution Went Awry

A few decades ago, I started the new year resolving to lose weight once and for all. 

After years of attempting to reach my ideal size, I was more determined than ever to drop some pounds and keep them off for good. 

My initial strategy was to ramp up my exercise and make different food choices, like eating more vegetables and fewer sweets. Seemed reasonable enough.

After losing a few pounds, people started complimenting me on my smaller size (“You look so good!”) and my eating decisions (“You’re so good!”). Their praise felt really good—and it motivated me to pull the reins in tighter. 

Downward Spiral
What seemed like a healthy resolution quickly spiraled into a disordered relationship with food and exercise. 

My list of food and exercise rules grew. I cut out more and more foods and ran more and more miles. 

I meticulously counted calories in and out (on paper and spreadsheets—apps weren't a thing back then).

Soon, my entire life was consumed by my desire to control my weight. I thought about food and my body constantly.

I neglected my relationships, my job, my social life—basically anything that threatened my desire for control. 

I stopped going to lunch with coworkers because I didn’t want to eat off plan. 

I would no longer go out on Saturday nights as I feared drinking “empty calories,” plus I had to get up early to work out. 

If I did go to a party, I was never fully present as I was preoccupied with all the forbidden foods I wanted to eat but wouldn’t let myself have.

I was chronically late to work because I just had to run one more mile before going into the office.

I underate during the day then overate at night. I freaked out if I ate “badly” and compensated by eating less and exercising more. 

And, naturally, since I was food policing myself, I often food policed other people’s food choices (“Do you know how many grams of sugar are in that?!”). 

I constantly checked my body and kept moving the goalposts. I’d reach my target weight and then aim for a lower number. It was never enough. 

What I was trying to control ended up controlling me. 

Disordered Eating Gateway
Although I’ve shared parts of my story before, I wanted to bring it up again as it’s so very tempting and understandable to go on a diet in the new year, especially since we’re bombarded with seductive success-story ads and everyone around us seems to be dieting.

While I've been anti-diet for some years now due to everything I've learned both personally and professionally, I completely believe in body autonomy including the right to diet. 

I also feel it's important to know what weight-loss companies and advocates will never tell you, namely the numerous ways dieting can harm you physically and physiologically. 

And they will certainly never warn you that for many people, dieting is a gateway to disordered eating, and for some, to actual eating disorders.

When you reflect on your dieting history, in what ways has dieting harmed you?

How to Ditch Diet and Weight Talk

When you’re working on breaking up with diet culture and healing your relationship with food and your body, you’ll likely become hyper-aware of how much your family members, friends and coworkers (and random strangers!) talk about diets and weight.

Whether it’s your mom raving about her new weight-loss plan, your trainer talking about his latest diet hack, a colleague complaining about how “bad” she’s eating, or a friend's frequent comments on other people’s bodies, diet and weight talk is everywhere.

If you’re like me, you probably used to participate in these conversations without giving it a second thought. This is completely understandable given how ingrained, habitual and normalized diet and weight talk are in our culture.

However, it doesn’t have to be the norm or acceptable, especially if you find such talk triggers negative feelings about your eating and body, causes you to doubt the path you’re on, tempts you to try one last diet, or just feels downright tiresome.

If this is the case, here are a few strategies for ditching diet and weight talk.

Don’t Contribute
When someone starts talking about these topics, don’t add fuel to the fire. By not contributing to the conversation, it will likely quickly peter out, especially if you’re engaging with just one person.

Change the Subject
There are a gazillion other things to talk about so changing the subject is usually pretty easy. Most of the time, the other person won’t even realize what you’ve done.

Remove Yourself
Remove yourself from the conversation by simply walking away or making an excuse to leave, such as needing to use the restroom or get back to work.

Make a Request, Set a Boundary
If you feel comfortable with making a specific request regarding what would be the most supportive or setting a boundary regarding what is no longer acceptable, following is some language to consider. Of course, what you say will depend on the situation and who you’re talking to. 

• Focusing on diets and weight has caused me to have a disordered relationship with food and my body. Will you help me create a healthy one by no longer talking about dieting and weight loss when we’re together?
  

• We waste so much time and energy talking about what we shouldn’t be eating and what’s wrong with our bodies. Can we agree to ditch the diet and weight talk and focus on more fun, interesting and meaningful subjects?
  

• I’m reclaiming my life from our toxic diet culture. Will you help me by not talking about or sending info on weight loss and diets, including detoxes, cleanses, resets, reboots and any other form of food restriction?
  

• All this talk about diets and weight feels so oppressive and disempowering. How about we make a pact to no longer discuss these things?
  

• I respect that you approach food and weight differently than I do. Can we agree to honor each other’s choices and not talk about these topics anymore?
  

• I love talking about all sorts of things with you, however, diets and weight are two things I won't talk about.
  

• I’m learning how to eat intuitively and accept my body. I'd appreciate if you supported me in this process by not bringing up anything about diets and weight. If you’d like to learn more, I’m happy to share my experience with you.

You Have the Right
Keep in mind that not everyone will remember your request or boundary, understand it or respect it—especially if they’re entrenched in diet culture. Thus, you may have to remind them multiple times, explain it further or be firmer.

Even if your conversations feel uncomfortable and scary, don’t give up.

You have the right to ask for what you need, to have your needs met, and to surround yourself with unconditional support